44 replies to this topic

[NKOTB]

Hi,
   With the cold weather I thought it would be something cheerful if we share your favorite CR post. It can be a pearls of wisdom, something hilarious, disgusting, controversial ...Maybe something for long time CR readers.

New_Kid

[Redback]

Blue Dog's race report from an Australia Day race in the city, a few years back now.

Or most of what UCB has recently posted in the current iPod or Cyclist threads (gives me a regular chuckle).

For inspiration, I always look to the Coast to Kosci race reports.

[miners]

anything on page 365,791 of the hijacker's thread

[Eagle]

The one I remember the most is Blue Dogs report. I can vividly imagine the poor race marshall requesting runner to turn right and pointing to her right when she meant the runner right and her left. I still smile.

ANYTHING UCB posts.  

[undercover brother]

Redback, on 21 June 2011 - 10:01 PM, said:

Blue Dog's race report from an Australia Day race in the city, a few years back now. if that was the one with the large green frog i agree. funniest thing i have ever seen on CR. linky anyone??
Or most of what UCB has recently posted in the current iPod or Cyclist threads (gives me a regular chuckle). i am being funny? you really shouldn't encourage me you know

[Stej]

My favourite post was one of the threads on recovery from stress fractures (thanks Cowboy and Emrun).  Not funny but certainly of HUGE help and reassurance as I have had troubles with stressies over the last few months.

[Jo Be]

Uncle Dave on the treadmill ... or at least the unceremonious exit from same.

[SMCRoadRaceSeries]

Jo Be, on 22 June 2011 - 03:32 PM, said:

Uncle Dave on the treadmill ... or at least the unceremonious exit from same.

I thought it was an ironing board...or different situation??

[SirPlod]

Mine are probably not so much one post, but more a collection of posts (especially race reports) which make up the entire Comrades Marathon thread.

Inspirational stuff.

[Paul Every]

I reckon that little post at the end of the GNW 100 Mile is pretty popular. Seen plenty of people hugging and kissing that over the years.

[seris]

Dog's Creeping Lameness. Loved it so much I had it laminated and carried it for the whole of my first GNW 100 miler... Here it is...
"Creeping Lameness #1 - 'Encouraging Outstanding Uselessness'

Recent history shows us that this contagious brand of mental vacuity has its origins in the education system.

That'd be the system where no one fails anything, ever, just in case it makes them feel bad. Well f#@k, boo-hoo.

As a cover-up they invented 'decile bandwidths' where even the dumbest knuckleheads can hide out. This propagates the fairytale myth of 'Puppies and Rainbows Land' where everyone can do everything.  

Instead of the pencil-necked geeks being told by the teacher "Look kid, you've got the physical ability and coordination of a sprayed cockroach; you'd be better off in the library on sport days" they got a 'decile-1 pass' at quoits or totem tennis.

The poor simple punters that enthusiastically embraced this crap also pass it on; they offer never-ending fountains of support and encouragement to those even less fortunate; those that in other times the 'laws of nature' had earmarked for early departure.

The running spin-off of this?

Physically bereft specimens who should be at home quilting get encouraged to drag their huffing carcasses over the finish of a half marathon in 2:45 or worse, then stick up a race report and wait for the accolades of 'champion', inspiration' and 'legend' to come flowing in from like-minded imbeciles. Unfortunately, the accolades don't last as long as a nice hand-made doona-cover; so it's a no-brainer to which activity they're be more suited.

It gets worse. Lately I've seen people being labeled as 'legends' for finishing a marathon .... OUTSIDE THE CUT-OFF TIME !!!

Am I being harsh? Nasty? Mean? No. Harsh, nasty and mean is making some well-intentioned volunteer course-marshal spend yet another hour or two of their generously-given time baby-sitting these self-centred turtles.

Giving 'em a DNF is too good. Their results should be should publicly be posted as 'FAILED'. Go away and train more or give up. That's the reality. If someone had've told 'em that back as kids, we wouldn't have the problem.

My solution to this would be to have timing chips that explode and blow your foot off if you cross the finish line after the cut-off time has expired.  As a reward they could be given one of those rubber things that go on the bottom of chair legs and wear it as a shoe.

Cheers, Blue Dog. B This post has been edited by Blue Dog: Today, 11:02 AM"
Just luv ya Dawg!

[Eagle]

I had forgotten that one by the Dog. I think it did get some replies  

[mgi11a]

I remember a Bellthorpe corker (no idea where or when)
But after someone asked an extremely long winded question that went for 1/2 a page,
BT replied with a very matter of fact "Yes"

[Redback]

I'd forgotten the exploding timing chip, one his greatest offerings

[Davo]

seris, on 22 June 2011 - 04:55 PM, said:

[b]"Creeping Lameness #1 - 'Encouraging Outstanding Uselessness'

Recent history shows us that this contagious brand of mental vacuity has its origins in the education system.

That'd be the system where no one fails anything, ever, just in case it makes them feel bad. Well f#@k, boo-hoo.

As a cover-up they invented 'decile bandwidths' where even the dumbest knuckleheads can hide out. This propagates the fairytale myth of 'Puppies and Rainbows Land' where everyone can do everything.  

Instead of the pencil-necked geeks being told by the teacher "Look kid, you've got the physical ability and coordination of a sprayed cockroach; you'd be better off in the library on sport days" they got a 'decile-1 pass' at quoits or totem tennis.

The poor simple punters that enthusiastically embraced this crap also pass it on; they offer never-ending fountains of support and encouragement to those even less fortunate; those that in other times the 'laws of nature' had earmarked for early departure.

The running spin-off of this?

Physically bereft specimens who should be at home quilting get encouraged to drag their huffing carcasses over the finish of a half marathon in 2:45 or worse, then stick up a race report and wait for the accolades of 'champion', inspiration' and 'legend' to come flowing in from like-minded imbeciles. Unfortunately, the accolades don't last as long as a nice hand-made doona-cover; so it's a no-brainer to which activity they're be more suited.

It gets worse. Lately I've seen people being labeled as 'legends' for finishing a marathon .... OUTSIDE THE CUT-OFF TIME !!!

Am I being harsh? Nasty? Mean? No. Harsh, nasty and mean is making some well-intentioned volunteer course-marshal spend yet another hour or two of their generously-given time baby-sitting these self-centred turtles.

Giving 'em a DNF is too good. Their results should be should publicly be posted as 'FAILED'. Go away and train more or give up. That's the reality. If someone had've told 'em that back as kids, we wouldn't have the problem.

My solution to this would be to have timing chips that explode and blow your foot off if you cross the finish line after the cut-off time has expired.  As a reward they could be given one of those rubber things that go on the bottom of chair legs and wear it as a shoe.

After first reading this I was tempted to retort "Didn't Hitler have similar ideas regarding "inadequate" people?"
But then I read it again and took particular notice of where it says "Go away and train more".  And that saved it for me.  Right on!!!

[twosheds]

mgi11a, on 22 June 2011 - 05:27 PM, said:

I remember a Bellthorpe corker (no idea where or when)
But after someone asked an extremely long winded question that went for 1/2 a page,
BT replied with a very matter of fact "Yes"

Pete Townsend ( the Who) did similar in an interview. he had a really long winded D and M question asked and translated in German to which he thought for quite a while and answered "Yah" Gotta love understatement.
I always enjoy  Bellthorpes posts.

[miners]

Wonder if we can find any of the original posts from Boof?  I remember one from 04(?) where he gave everyone other than his mother a complete pasting for something that went wrong with his left shoe

[Whippet Man]

RobHall bought a circulation booster with a view to 'passively' exercising his puny calf muscles into ultrarunning machines. Apparently you place your feet on some conductive pad and stick other pads on your chest or arms. Whatever the combination he cranked it up ultra style and his arms were contorting into electronic spasms and he couldn't reach the dial to turn it off and couldn't lift his feet to break the circuit. The mental picture had me in stitches.

[langswm]

miners, on 23 June 2011 - 09:44 AM, said:

Wonder if we can find any of the original posts from Boof?  

Ah, those were the days...Boof "chasing" Vespa.

He gets sighted every now and again, usually training somewhere up near Lane Cove NP. He still wears "those" shorts  

[Leaf]

mgi11a, on 22 June 2011 - 05:27 PM, said:

I remember a Bellthorpe corker (no idea where or when)
But after someone asked an extremely long winded question that went for 1/2 a page,
BT replied with a very matter of fact "Yes"

Doesn't that happen daily?

[SMCRoadRaceSeries]

miners, on 23 June 2011 - 09:44 AM, said:

Wonder if we can find any of the original posts from Boof?

Here's what appears to be the last thread with him in it. Classic stuff that starts with a ripper from Sparkie in response to something Boof said in an earlier thread about two other CRs

Boof -now with subtitles

Enjoy.

[Davo]

SMCRoadRaceSeries, on 23 June 2011 - 01:33 PM, said:

Here's what appears to be the last thread with him in it. Classic stuff that starts with a ripper from Sparkie in response to something Boof said in an earlier thread about two other CRs

Boof -now with subtitles

Enjoy.

I see that Vegie-girl gave a response to that original post.
Some of her comments weren't bad.....

[iRonnie]

Quote

Ron I object in the strongest possible terms to your choice of avatar.

Whilst drawn in cartoon fashion, it depicts something exceedingly violent and repulsive.

The fact that you feel a need to put such an image on public display obviously means you promote violence to all consumers. We here on this site are all consumers of running-related products amongst myriad other things.

Is that what you would like to see happen to all of us ? WELL IS IT !!!! IMPALED BY A HUGE SCREW ????

You obviously have total disregard for the governance documents and policies of the Qld Masters Athletics association and should be expelled forthwith from that organisation .... or do they endorse your intimidating, bellicose and barbaric depictions of what you would like to see happen to all consumers which ultimately would threaten world peace and harmony?

I will await their reply on this matter. I simply cannot believe they would condone such outrageous savagery.

For you to display such an image during the time of a Papal visit to this fair country; a visit which has promoted and fostered understanding and harmony within the various wonderful cultures that make up this great land; this can only be interpreted as you not supporting these values. Are you the anti-christ??? ARE YOU ????

Blue Dog.

  
It's great when you get fan mail from a legend .

FYI. The offending item(for no other reason than to give meaning to BD's telling Ron off)) .

 post-4976-1220269438_thumb.png   15.82K   18 downloads

Pretend violins are playing.

Edited by iRonnie, 25 June 2011 - 03:14 PM.

[russell2pi]

Not as funny as the above but possibly one of my favourite threads at the moment is Western States 2011.  I'm just amazed at the level of coverage we can now get on the Internet, of an event that will probably receive no mention at all in Australia's conventional media. Not to mention rubbing shoulders with the giants   .

[Rock Doctor]

More offerings from Blue Dog. In my opinion, this is his finest work.

Quote

Posted 08 March 2009 - 08:56 PM

Hmmm.

More than just a fun-run.

A total experience designed to challenge not only running ability but also test each entrant's resilience, initiative, willpower and ..... patience.

I've had to wait since Australia Day 2006 to experience another event like this. That famous occasion was Monty Python-esque in its madcap plunge into total disarray. Read all about it here !!!. (You may have to scroll down the page a little).

Today's Belrose Fun Run, - staged by a newly-opened local-area gym, while in a similar vein, bore more resemblance to a Simpsons' episode.

Here's my highlights, and I've scored each out of ten; - taking into account originality, ingenuity and the all-important PIP (Potential for Injury to People).

1/ 'The Dummy Entry Form'

Accessed on the 'net via the CR running calendar. Promises that for entering 'early' (before race day) you get a free water bottle. Truly devious; neither of the hyper-links provided actually took you to an entry form. This game of 'Find The Entry Form' consumed a lot of valuable time during the week, and I still haven't found the hidden clue.

Kill endless hours trying it for yourself, or leave it for a rainy day - "Visit the website for more details. Click here for an entry form."

Strong points for originality, but the true beauty really lies in the subtle ingenuity of its design. Minute by minute it leads the hapless potential entrant / keyboard user to slowly experience ever-increasing levels of frustration, increased heart rate and high blood pressure, until you actually do believe "wow, I think it's time I joined a gym." 9/10

2/ 'The Registration Queues'

I know, this one has been done to death many times before, but they did throw in a new variation. They had three people taking pre-entered registrations (obviously the brainiacs and techno-boffins who broke the Da Vinci Code and hacked into the secret on-line entry form ... not many in this queue and admittedly they deserve a drink bottle) and only one person taking 'on-the-day' rego's, where the queue was far more substantial, snaking its way right across the large room and back through the entrance doorway.

This manifested itself in a twenty-minute delay of the scheduled start time, so in an attempt to entertain the assembled masses they hastily arranged an impromptu pre-race warm up class. On announcing this, all the gym-junkies and other true believers rushed to a vacant grassy area, formed lines and began gyrating, box-stepping and grape-vining themselves into a frenzy, while a wild-eyed dervish of a woman positioned up front led them on with almost religious fervour, splitting the air with repetitive loud, spine-chilling shrieks of "WOOH !"

Anyone who actually runs looked on and thought "WTF....??? somebody call a priest quick and we'll begin the exorcisms ...!!!" 7/10

3/ 'Start-Line Briefing' (a.k.a. 'The Course-Whisperer')

Oh what a classic. Things got even better. The sub-standard PA system was located at the rear of the field of runners. I assume the BOP's (Back Of the Pack-ers), prammers and quilters got a detailed description of course directions, lay-out and other intricacies while the PNG's and other runners in the front ten rows looked at each other and whispered "what is she saying?" and "which way do we go?" .... 8/10

4/ 'Start Line Obstacles'

Fantastic! - Brazen, blatant, audacious and 'in your face.' Stunning in the simplicity of it all and the potential for big PIP points!

Commencing with an immovable 1x1x1 metre brick and concrete structure placed smack-bang dead-centre, and two metres in front of the start line; I kid you not.

Of course we lucky ones up front could see it, and after the gun went off I didn't hang around to see the ensuing calamities, but they must have been thigh-slappingly humourous with guffaws a-plenty.

If they publish complete race-results down the track and list the names of those at the bottom whose race ended at this obstacle e.g.

'Ima Citizen - DNF - 0.002 km'
" " " " " etc.

.... I swear I will laugh 'til I cry.

They even placed a guy in a cheap green suit named 'Hop the Frog' on top of this obstacle to lure unsuspecting little kiddies into the trap. 'Hop' himself had been wandering around like a grinning idiot all morning achieving nothing, he got on my nerves early on and well prior to the start I was wishing someone would crash-tackle him into oblivion.

Just before the start they asked everyone to participate in a countdown from ten to one. 'Hop' announced he would be doing it in French. When he said "dix" I thought he should have stopped there; it seemed very appropriate; however the countdown continued and naturally all the little kids in the front row took off at "quatre', with 'Hop' screaming "wait, I haven't even got to 'trois' yet !!!" It was all so beautifully, bewilderingly bizarre.

"You can't push a bowling-ball through a garden hose" - ....... So the gun fired and the start-line sprint took place, and a mere thirty metres further on the hundreds of runners who successfully negotiated the concrete block were then funneled into a one-metre wide gateway that led to the street. It bore a striking resemblance to a large flock of sheep being herded into the mulesing yard. A double-whammy of groin and limb-threatening danger in the first twenty seconds: - awesome! -9/10

5/ Water

Another oldie but goodie, but this time presented with a well-disguised twist. The initial aid station was at 1500m. 'Mmm, interesting; not thirsty yet', I thought, giving it a miss like everyone else. The fiendish irony in this became evident later when one realised there was no water at the finish. Devilish humour!

It was a humid morning, and after running a 10k race at North Head the previous day, doing a 90-minute steam-room/swim recovery session in the arvo' and arriving directly from a 14-hour night-shift prior to running in this 10km race, I felt more than a little dehydrated, and that I possibly merited a glass of water at the finish. I asked. They looked at me strangely. One lady said "there's a tap at the side of the building" before another added "no, no ... there's a bubbler inside!" Another said "there are cold drinks over there."

Indeed there was, and I sauntered over and grabbed a bottled water. While I prepared to untwist its cap and lovingly admired it's soon-to-be-administered life-restoring contents, a girl said 'that'll be three dollars please." I fleetingly thought of all the free unconsumed water at the 1500m aid station, and smiled wryly as I finally comprehended the joke. I'm labelling it 'The Queensland Gag' - a flood of water when you don't need it, and a drought when you do.

True class, wonderfully creative in its conception and obviously the product of a twisted mind. 'Cruel humour' ... I love it! - 8/10

P.S. I don't carry money while running. Gently placing the treasured bottle of water back in its icy crib, I went in search of the bubbler, fervently praying it would be easier to find than the on-line entry form.

6/ 'Race Bibs'

Wonderful, paradigm-forming ingenuity.

Registered. Got my bib, complete with hand-written number in black felt pen and pinned it on. The race bib was notepad-quality paper.

During the race I pondered an intriguing three-way correlation between 1/ - speed, 2/ - the sweat produced by each individual runner, and 3/ - the total distance actually run .... before the paper race bib became soft enough to fall off.

Mine called it a day around the 7km point. I raced back to pick it, thinking I may need it at the finish to determine results. As I tucked the soggy mass into the front of my running shorts, the next runner coming from behind yelled to me "Don't worry about it ...mine fell off before halfway!"

I concluded that although a little slower in than I in speed, he sweated more profusely than me, a combination directly leading to the premature demise of his race bib. I dwelt briefly upon other variables such as skin pore size, wicking properties of different fabrics and even bib-positioning, before vowing to research this at a later time and and continuing my race.

Post-race, after much internet trawling and even a thorough examination of Noakes' "Lore of Running", I can find no previous references to such race-bib skulduggery, and having never personally witnessed this before, it scores full points on originality alone .... 10/10

7/ 'The Finish Chute'

Comprising the main footpath that winds through the complex, a final 100 metres of obstacles including toddlers, pedestrians, shoppers, dogs and prams had to be avoided. A greeting at the start / finish line by a guy standing on that concrete block and calling out your approximate finishing time brought closure to the torment. No results, no awards, no idea.  5/10

After the previously-mentioned post-race search for water, I decided to traverse the car park and grab a few dollars out of my vehicle so I could purchase a sports-drink. Being in a semi-secluded parking spot I also decided to change out of my sweat-saturated running clothes.

During this private procedure I rediscovered my race bib. It had totally disintegrated and formed a paper-mache cast over the top of my genitals. I carefully removed it, hoping to dry it out as a fitting memento of the morning. As an unexpected bonus, residual stains from the leeching of the black ink had left interesting zebra-stripes on my appendage, leaving it with an appearance not unlike some exotic tropical banded snake.

*******************************************************************

The organisers are planning two of these runs each year.

I know, I know .... -"Never, ever again" is what I should be thinking. Yet beyond my control, like a moth to the flame, I also know I shall return.

There's something riveting and compelling about breath-taking organisational naivety, and I'm telling you, these guys are good!

Cheers, Blue Dog.  

[tdm]

I remember reading that one (post #25 above) and having a giggle to myself.
Reading it again was well worthwhile. Funny stuff - thanks Rock Doctor and Blue Dog!

[Davo]

Blue Dog, that was priceless!  
Did you go again the next year?

[TropicThunder]

mgi11a, on 22 June 2011 - 05:27 PM, said:

I remember a Bellthorpe corker (no idea where or when)
But after someone asked an extremely long winded question that went for 1/2 a page,
BT replied with a very matter of fact "Yes"

twosheds, on 23 June 2011 - 09:40 AM, said:

Pete Townsend ( the Who) did similar in an interview. he had a really long winded D and M question asked and translated in German to which he thought for quite a while and answered "Yah" Gotta love understatement.
I always enjoy  Bellthorpes posts.

Unfortunately for CR you'll find Bellthorpes name at the bottom of a lot of threads - he has a way of stopping them dead in their tracks and there's not much value in that for an online forum....

Race Reports from the GNW are my favourite posts - the worst were the Team Salomon promo posts written by one their work experience kids pretending to be a sponsored runner hijacking TNF100

[walshy2]

Blue Dogs account of the Belrose Fun Run. I had tears rolling down my face when I first read it I was laughing so much

Still very funny reading it now

[Peterhorse]

Too funny. I need to post on the other thread "you know you're a runner when" that "you know you're a runner when you get everything in Blue Dog's Belorse Race Report"  beatiful... there are other that have come close, but that race is gold

[undercover brother]

thanks for that RD!
yes - that's the one i was thinking of in the post above.
i was so impressed at the time i even kept a copy of this photo...

Attached Files

•  dont fall over at start!.jpg   178.11K   134 downloads

[Blue Dog]

A few people mentioned this thread to me so I thought I'd have a look. Good memories!

Here's The Australia Day 2006 post that someone mentioned earlier -

Blue Dog's race report Aussie Day 2006

Someone more famous than me once said -

"Life is either a tragic comedy or a comic tragedy, I'm never sure of which."

Yesterday's Sydney 'Medibank Australia Day Fun Run' reminded me of that saying with vivid clarity.

Not really believing they could exceed last year's efforts, the organisers did themselves proud, with a mix of old and new that made this year's event the most farcical yet.

Short of getting John Cleese as host next year, I really don't believe yesterday can be surpassed.

Even before the event began, the spirit of Ned Kelly was in evidence as I forked out $30 entry fee for the 8km run. At nearly $4 per km, that sort of highway robbery would've had young Ned beaming.

Please Medibank, from all of us runners, from the bottom of our hearts, our aortae, and both ventricles, please, please, please don't begin sponsoring marathons: - we can't afford it.

In the interest of fairness, and in case anyone missed the fine print on the entry form, the princely sum of one whole dollar from each entry was donated to medical research.

Woo-Hoo, pass the scalpel please nurse, we're goin' in!

As for the run itself, there were many highlights.

Someone displayed a stroke of comic genius in suggesting a three-lap circuit for an 8km run, and that individual deserves recognition - perhaps next year's Australia Day honours list ... who knows?

After starting off, the result of this brilliant concept was that the quicker runners on their second lap were catching the slower participants who were still on their first lap:- all this at precisely the part of the course where it exited off the four-lane-wide Driver Avenue and onto the 2-metre-wide bike track.

To separate these two sections of the course, and smack bang in the middle of the 'running line,' were four strategically-placed metal bollards (posts), cunningly reaching the precise height to inflict maximum damage upon the 'landing gear' of the unwary runner.

Talk about laugh; the ensuing human log-jam saw people scrambling & tripping over themselves in all directions, in various attempts to get out of each others way, whilst at the same time not being either neutered, spayed or impaled upon a one-meter high metal post!

Amidst this havoc, the frontrunners put on an incredibly adept display of the side-step, the swerve, the in-and-away, the fend-off and the occasional shoulder-charge, which would have earned most a contract across the road with the Roosters or the Swans.

Through a combination of sweat and tears of laughter, I didn't actually see any of the cameras capturing this debacle for 'World's Funniest Disasters' but I'm sure they were there. It had to be a set-up. It just had to be.

Well done organisers, you got us all good and proper, and I for one can't wait to see it all on TV; there's gonna' be so many people I know!

And that's not all folks, we got to do it all again on the third lap .... ha ha ha, are my sides sore from the exertion of the first race of the year, or from laughing?

Around this time, the organisers trotted out the old 'Sorry, We've-Run-Out-of-Water' trick at one of the aid stations.

Look, I know it's been done to death in the past, but hey, it still gets a bloody huge belly laugh from everyone. You guys rock!

Unbelievably, it got even better, because for me the absolute highlight of the day was at the 7km marker, which was either 680 metres from the finish, or at 47 years of age I ran the last km in 02:43 flat - take your pick.

At the 7km point, there was a barrier dividing the course, accompanied by a vocal female course marshall, who was facing the oncoming runners and giving stern directions of - "second lap to the left: third lap to the right" ... and she was doing it with a straight face; what a legend.

The problem was, she was meaning her own left and right, which, naturally, means exactly the opposite to the oncoming runners.

This saw quite a few people on their second lap being directed into the finishing chute, despite having one more lap to go, and some runners on their third lap going around for a fourth time, and extracting real value for money. Great stuff! Lady, take a bow!

Not only did these early two-lap 'finishers' do so with really respectable times, but as a coup-de-gras, this ensured that the overall result-recording process was thrown into complete chaos. Does it get any better than that?

Truly hilarious and wonderful to watch, this was almost worth the entry fee alone. The marshalls at the finish in their lovely red Medibank polo shirts battled on stoically, trying not to give the game away, but we all knew, that they knew, it had all turned to ka-ka.

It was rivetting to watch, like most natural disasters. Almost orgasmic with national pride and fervour, these people provided truly marvellous comedy, and oh-so wonderfully funny!

Other wonders to behold on the day included 'Sam's Sausage Stand,' the only food provider in the area, struggling to feed the assembled multitude of 1500 or so people, and the winner of the 4km race being awarded a mountain bike ??? ... he's a runner. Charlie, you lucky devil!

All in all, it was a truly amazing, Monty Python-esque day which could not possibly be bettered next year. I just can't wait for the movie.

And so, at this time next year, I will be off to Penrifff (that's right, wif 3 'f's) to sample their 10k Aussie Day race, where everyone runs a good time. That's because it's only 9.8k's, so despite any problems, everyone's happy.

It's also free .

Cheers and Happy Birthday Australia,
Blue Dog.

[Peterhorse]

ROFLMFAO... gold and sliver to Blue Dog!

(one poor marshall achieved similar greatness in a Doomben 10k/21k a couple of years back, sending half the field back home a little ahead of time - my mate's finishing time of 27:xx for 10k earned him bragging rights at work for about 30mins until word got out it was 7.8k).

[Davo]

Peterhorse, on 02 July 2011 - 12:22 PM, said:

ROFLMFAO... gold and sliver to Blue Dog!

(one poor marshall achieved similar greatness in a Doomben 10k/21k a couple of years back, sending half the field back home a little ahead of time - my mate's finishing time of 27:xx for 10k earned him bragging rights at work for about 30mins until word got out it was 7.8k).

It was longer ago than that, PH.
It was before I left Brisbane in '07, so I reckon it would have been about '05 or '06.
I was standing near to Phil when he first heard the news. He doubled up in combined anger, frustration and disbelief.
Funny now, but it sure wasn't funny at the time!

[PiledHigherq]

No special mention for 'Sustainable 3 minute k's?'

[NKOTB]

Thank you very much Blue Dog for your "The Australia Day 2006 post". It is hilarous.

New_Kid

[Spectre]

Dog's Belrose race report had me in hysterics when he first posted it, I've reread it just now and have tears running down my face. Takes the cake IMHO.

[Kandingo]

short 10km at Doomben was 2007...8.8km

[Davo]

Kandingo, on 04 July 2011 - 10:34 PM, said:

short 10km at Doomben was 2007...8.8km

Yes I think you're right Kandingo. It was just a few weeks before I left in mid-'07.
I still have the photo of me and Tank Girl cheering the runners that day.
Great times!

[slowmc]

Hi there,

Thanks Rock Doctor for posting Blue Dog's classic post on the famous or was it infamous Belrose Fun Run of 09 and bringing back some long submerged memories.It's as funny now as it was then, and I have to say it was all true as I was one of those unfortunates that completed the 10km on the day very slowly. I always considered myself lucky to return to my vehicle in one piece that day without running into concrete posts or mad green frogs out on that course or even getting lost. Great stuff.

slowmc

[tonedbutt]

Hard to narrow it down to a single post but my fave topic is
"Things that irk me".  I find it thereapeutic and some of Bellthorpe's responses to my irks are hilarious.

[superflake]

Jo Be, on 22 June 2011 - 03:32 PM, said:

Uncle Dave on the treadmill ... or at least the unceremonious exit from same.

Sorry to embarass Uncle again.

"My most memorable fall would have to be on a treadmill of all places (really rough terrain there!)

In my early uni days I had a trackie-daks thing going on. So I went to the gym, and instead of starting with a slow jog, I straddled the belt and kept pressing the "faster" button until the thing got to top speed (16 or 17kph - fast!).

Then I proceeded to jump on to the moving belt - bad idea!

It attempted to hurl me off; at about 16-17kph (very fast!), and although my legs were going one way, instinct for some reason told me to grab the balance bar at the front of the machine - bad move!

I ended up at full stretch, with my hands on the balance bar at the front, and my feet thrown just over the rear edge of the machine, with toes on the ground, and my shins resting against the rear of the belt (still rotating at 16-17 kph - very fast).

As I was wearing my trusty trackie-daks, the belt soon caught on to them, and soon, in front of the whole gym, I wasn't wearing much at all, and was screaming for dear life for someone to pull the bloody safety plug!

A very memorable day! " Falling down stories

[cakeboy]

PiledHigherq, on 02 July 2011 - 08:49 PM, said:

No special mention for 'Sustainable 3 minute k's?'

My personal favourite.. they do say aim high and shoot for the stars.

I also liked most of durianriders work; all that 30 banana a day eating plus the "I was training with Lance the other day and asked him how he does bla bla..." stuff was gold. I wonder how he's going with bananas 15 bucks a kg.

Edited by cakeboy, 23 August 2011 - 11:16 AM.

[TropicThunder]

slowmc, on 05 July 2011 - 04:21 PM, said:

Hi there,

Thanks Rock Doctor for posting Blue Dog's classic post on the famous or was it infamous Belrose Fun Run of 09 and bringing back some long submerged memories.It's as funny now as it was then, and I have to say it was all true as I was one of those unfortunates that completed the 10km on the day very slowly. I always considered myself lucky to return to my vehicle in one piece that day without running into concrete posts or mad green frogs out on that course or even getting lost. Great stuff.

slowmc

Collective all (esp Dog) - you'll be pleased to know the infamous green frog still exists. It made a surprise appearance at the gate of our local school. And true to form proceded to block the entrance gate until each child and parent took a pamphlet promoting the gym. Leading (as per fun run) to utter chaos as entire school community could not physically leave the school.

Believe the school principal delivered what many of you wished could have done on the fateful day in 2009 - a swift kick the the frog's nether regions.

Said frog was last seen hobbling away.........but i'm sure we haven't heard the last of him.....

[Ponytail]

nofootprints said:

Enables people to.........connect with themselves physically



Ah, Ok, now I get what you're talking about! Sorry it took me so long. I'm not good at interpreting these 'back of the paper' coded adverts



nofootprints said:

I have created a workshop that is unique in Australia.

It provides participants with intuitive skills to develop a........style that is injury free, rhythmic, happy and connected.


Yeah, got to get that rhythm going


nofootprints said:

Participants are taken through a series of drills that show them on an intuitive basis how their bodies are meant to work.


I'm pretty sure I know how it works in that dept mate.


nofootprints said:

The workshop does NOT teach a prescriptive form.......as participants are their own best teachers.


You betcha! Through self tuition and really disciplined years of training, using gels to get me through the longer sessions, I have come on leaps and bounds


nofootprints said:

I have only recently returned to Australia


Deported? Feel for you dude. It's hard to know all the rules of some of these countries hey. Who'd have known that sitting in a park with a load of like minded people, all connecting with themselves, would be illegal



nofootprints said:

Everyone who does the course comes away with new insights


No doubt you are a wise and experienced man and I am only an amateur but mate, I have been connecting with myself since my early teens, maybe earlier. It may be that I am the exception to the rule, but I've found that over the years I am the best at connecting with myself. Others have got involved at various other times but I am yet to meet anyone as good as myself. I feel I need no lessons. Sorry if I come across as arrogant



nofootprints said:

The introductory course........costs 75 dollars


Woah!!!! That seems pretty steep. I went to Amsterdam once and their lessons were a lot cheaper. They also moved beyond the self connection course too, all for a much lesser price. Any thoughts on this? I know that's your price and we maybe shouldn't haggle over it but maybe to compensate you could throw in a goody bag? Tissues? a pair of socks? On the subject of socks, you do mention doing it bare foot but I usually leave the other sock on. Is this OK?


nofootprints said:

The course draws on my interest in the several disciplines


I'm with you brother. Of the disciplines I'm more of a fan of slow and steady as opposed to fast and furious. But sometimes I used to go for the latter if my parents were due home any moment and I wanted to be done before they arrived. Are there any other disciplines?


nofootprints said:

This course has been useful for new and very experienced.........who find themselves getting endlessly injured or just want to know more about their bodies and how they shoudl work or just hope to expand their awareness.


Geez, there are people getting injured?!!! Are these the people who sometimes choke a little or use performance enhancing drugs like amyl nitrate or similar? You mean those guys?



nofootprints said:

I am constantly amazed at how medical doctors, personal trainers, physios etc find out new things about their bodies from attending this course.



Yeah, we all like to connect. Whether you're the cleaner or the president.




In summary, I think I'm comfortable with my knowledge on the subject and feel I need no lessons. Sure, I could likely get better but I'm happy with where I'm at.

By the way, I fully understand why you don't want to offer proof by submitting your stats and achievements or videos and definitely understand why others don't want to offer testaments of your work

I'm sure the dodgey cut'n'paste here won't do it justice (not sure how to link to a post) but Cappy's response to the recent In Topic: Intro to Natural Running had me in tears!

Edited by ponytail, 23 August 2011 - 05:21 PM.