66 replies to this topic

[Seasider]

This may be very long winded and I apologise to start with!

I am 51, female who hasnt done ANY real exercise for the past 30 years. I have played occassional game of netball, but only as GK!, I am 1.70 tall and weigh about 85kg, so overweight. My BMI is 29. I have normal to low blood pressure.

I have absolutely NO motivation, will power, enthusiam, mojo whatever to do any sort of fitness. My trouble is, and I am going to be brutally honest, is that I am lazy, I dont want to do anything, I cant be bothered.

I joined one of those female only clubs, went for about 2 months, got bored with it, tried the couch to 5km thingy, gave up after 2 weeks. What on earth is wrong with me?
I have tried the 'give yourself a treat' method, work with a friend, you wont want to let them gown....doesnt work. Even the 'you will get diabetes/die whatever' doesnt really bother me!!

I would be grateful for any pointers on how to get myself out of this fug, (although again to be honest, I have always been idle!) get off my backside and do something!

I have seen a 9km programme in a magazine which I thought I should/could do which is why I am asking for help.
Many thanks to you all

Edited by Seasider, 27 July 2012 - 03:36 PM.

[Bert]

Hi Seasider. Welcome to  CR.
My original motivation to run was setting myself the goal of doing the City to Surf. I didnt want to become a runner. I just wanted to do the event once for the experience. I did the event off six weeks training and was hooked on running. That was in 1988 and I have run every C2S since, as well as quite a few other races.
Hope this is some help to you.

[twosheds]

Clearly at some level you do want to do this, otherwise you wouldn't be posting here. Your post makes me feel really sad- exercise  could really enhance your quality of life.  I guess like anything worthwhile in life - its going to take effort and you just have to accept that. The wonderful thing though is that in time you will want to do i- it is always an effort but the effort feel more worth it as you get fitter and  you will just do it because you couldn't imagine not doing it. New things will motivate you, once you get fitter too- it will tickle some  little place of energy and you will find that it stimulates all kinds of things.
Do you have this lack of motivation in other areas of your life- or is it purely in the exercise realm? If it is in all areas of your life - you might consider talking  to a doctor or psychologist if not- suck it up- nothing good is easy. ( Don't mean to be brutal- but you cannot expect to enjoy good health as you get older if you don't treat your body well.) Best of luck- sounds like you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.
t
I took up running as a teenager who was low in energy and overweight. Changed not just my body but my life. ( Im now 48).
Formulate an image of the person you want to be and keep that image in your head- and move slowly towards that goal-maybe its someone with lots of energy, fit, into life,  etc and make it happen. I don't think there is much anyone else can say. Dont wait till you have diabetes for that threat to bother you.
twosheds

[Martin Dugdale]

motivation has to come from within, but there can be many triggers.
do you have a goal in mind?
if so then create a plan to achieve that goal.
do not expect it to be either easy or fast, most training goals take years  or at least many months.

next if you do not have a goal, then create one, make it difficult but achievable in a given time, then go for it.
wish you luck and persistence

[Andrew2]

Can I suggest the simple strategy of getting started on whatever you feel you can, and updating regularly here?    There are lots of examples on CR of friendly support from fellow runners, whether slow or fast, starting out or experienced.
I'll be keen to see how you go, and I'm sure thats true of others.
Let us know what you plan to do, then when you make the first step, then take it from there.
Good luck!

[Quill]

I think there's a bit of a hump to get over before any of us truly enjoy exercise. When you're unfit and not involved with exercise at all (as I have been for most of my life) the brain quite reasonably associates it with pain and sweat and nothing more. Sure, we can intellectualise to ourselves that it's 'good for us' and will 'give us more energy' but it still doesn't solve the basic problem that exercise sucks - in the beginning. This makes motivation so much harder to find to begin with, and is why so few people stick with it.

But I found that once I got fit enough to push it harder with less discomfort, exercise began to make me feel good in and of itself, quite apart from weight loss or anything else. It relaxes me and increases my self-esteem and lord knows what else. I firmly believe if you stick with it long enough that you can enjoy exercise for its own sake, the very act itself becomes its own motivation. The trick is to concentrate on how good you feel after, not how in hell you'll hack the pain this time - not surprisingly, you need enough experience with the feeling-good part to really make a proper go of that. Just stick with it, remove the pressure from yourself and wait for the day you begin to get cranky if you DON'T exercise!

Edited by Quill, 29 July 2012 - 06:42 PM.

[Duf]

Seasider, congrats for taking this big step and asking for help....everyone seeks motivation from time to time to exercise but I think the key is you never really find the motivation, what you need to do is formulate a plan, suck it up, stick to the plan and then.....motivation and enjoyment will come.
It's true starting exercise is always hard, uncomfortable and definately no fun, but once you get over the hump Quill talked about what follows is truely worthwhile.
My husband never trained in his life and then saw himself in some tv ad that he didn't like, he didn't enjoy it to start but sucked it up (i also gave him no option to get out of training) and he finally turned several corners where he started pushing himself, would formulate his own goals and loved his new and improved body.
I agree with Bert about registering for a race of some sort. That's what I made my hubby do. I signed up for my first marathon when I made this return back to running and then I told EVERYONE about it so I was accountable.
Best of luck, suck it up and ignore those voices that are making all the excuses and go for it!!!

[Seasider]

Thank you all for your advice/ comments, I especially liked Quills - very realistic, just what I thought and glad to hear other people do too!. Well I did suck it up and have been out for the past three days, not doing too much just running and wlaking, but I have started so hopefully it will continue, (if you never hear from me again you can bet your bottom dollar Ive wimped out!!!), So if you see a (very) middle aged woman huffing and puffing wearing absolutely awful trackpants and tee shirt (I dont think they do 'proper' sports kit in my size!), give me a smile!

[Duf]

Congrats Seasider...you are doing what a lot of people haven't done the last three days!!! Keep up the good work... remember it does get easier....fantastic effort!!!!!!!

[4range]

Seasider,

you post actually & genuinely saddens me.

I dont really know why. I guess, it's because I was slightly active previously, but mostly sat around killing myself with the ciggies for many years, and I see some of my reflection in your post.

I managed to give up the smokes (promise to my son) & promptly set about killing myself slowly with fizzy drinks, chocolates & junk foods.

One day I realised that I had ground to a halt & that the things that I promised myself I would do later, were still there for later & later & so on.

There is much more to this story, but in short I started running with my daughter for the cross country - she did her event & gave it away - I kept going as i was seeing benefits in my health & sleeping & weight & general demeanor & one day, it just clicked & yes I'll admit it, I suddenly realised why the hell Forrect Gump kept running, So, so did I, I felt like I could run forever & god knows, I wanted to.

I was over weight & slow, but man, I was enjoying every minute of it.

I suffer from withdrawals now if I cant run, & I just cant figure why every one that can, doesnt do this - it's as near as dammit a free recreational drug in the truest sense, & just about every run has something different to enjoy.

So what saddens me, I guess that it's that you have not yet experienced that, & are expressing so much self doubt. (pretty much like I did)

But Hey, you can get over that (& have started to). Whatever you do, just damn well enjoy it, take it slowly & stop to smell the roses every so often - look for the little things - like the bird singing or the shape of a particular cloud - the fresh gold of the wattle blooms... all of these things make it worthwhile.

I Join all the others here who will offer you every encouragement, but dont do it for them - do it for you.

the first time you sleep better, you will already know you are onto a good thing & from there, all you have to do is remember.

[Bert]

And dont forget to stop now and then and look around and enjoy just being alive.

[Seasider]

WOW, thanks Bert, glad to hear that there are people like me out there, but have actually 'done it'. I have been out every day now for six days, run (slowly) walk (medium). I have been to different places each day to vary things, now I am going to the first place again today. I have even been out in the rain!!! One of my very good friends is a bit of a runner, and I am going to keep on (hopefully) until I can surprise her and ask to join her on one of her (shorter) runs.
Thanks everyone, I shall keep posting  how I am doing and hopefully you will all be willing to give me a kick up the butt as and when I need it

[Bert]

Sounds good Seasider! Dont try for too much too soon, just keep moving foreward steadily. There is a lot of useful information available here on CR and lots of us have been through your experience, so just ask if you need to. There are no dumb questions just stupid answers.

[Curreo]

From reading numerous stories on coolrunning of how people got into running I would say that a very large percentage, if not the majority, have come from similar non-active backgrounds like yourself (myself included).  And I think I probably speak for most when I say that running has completely changed our lives!

[runwesteros]

Hi Seasider,

Well done! You have made a great start by getting out and run/walking. I am sure there are a lot of coolrunners who have started the same way. 10 years ago I did exactly the same thing and I used to marvel at people who could run around the block nonstop. Don't be discouraged by any naysayers (they are jealous) and don't worry about the way you look - we are all very unattractive at some stage when we are all sweaty and puffy. Set small goals for yourself - but keep in mind a larger goal eg your 5k run. Keep posting on coolrunning - you will get tons of support here. It also helps to find a group of likeminded people or a running club to keep you motivated.
Good Luck - you can do it. Remember every journey starts with the first step!!

[4range]

Seasider,

I am pleased that you have followed up with another post, we have been wondering how you were going! - From what you say, it looks like you must have busted the the "lazy" gene (we all have one).

The thing is, that it can grow back very quickly, & the trick is not to let it. Every time you get up & 'have a go' you reduce the ability for it to re-grow.

When the time comes, (and it will), & the lazy gene is close to re-growing, & you least feel like getting moving,  remember that this is not the time for chocolate, it's the time that you most need to get up & go. if you dont, it might be too late, & the Gene will re-form!

You have set a great goal. Imagine how you are going to feel, the day you get out & join your friend for the first time! not only will you be proud of yourself for the achievement, but you will enjoy the cameraderie.

By the way, time to think of yourself as a runner - you have started now, & are branded accordingly - no one can tell you different!

We are all waiting for the next update!

[Duf]

Go Seasider!!!!!!!!

Thanks for the update, great to hear!!!!

Make a promise that if the "lazy" gene (as 4range described) does resurface you jump straight on here???????????

[cairnsman]

wow awesome thread not only for seasider being open an honest about her abilites and lack of. but from all the people offering warm and honest heartfelt advice.

[4range]

C'mon Seasider,

tell us how you are going?

[Seasider]

Thanks for all your support everyone, I am going ok,

I am up to running 2 minutes and walking 3mins  x 7, and I do this five times a week. I am supposed to run 800m x 4, but I just cant manage it, so I am just sticking with the run/walk thing until I get fitter/more stamina. The programme increases the running by 30 sec and reducing the walking by 30secs each week.

Also I have been to the Docs, having some tests etc and she said (hopefully this isnt too much info for some), I am probably menopausal which is why I feel down/crap etc!!

[twosheds]

Seasider, on 16 August 2012 - 10:20 AM, said:

Thanks for all your support everyone, I am going ok,

I am up to running 2 minutes and walking 3mins  x 7, and I do this five times a week. I am supposed to run 800m x 4, but I just cant manage it, so I am just sticking with the run/walk thing until I get fitter/more stamina. The programme increases the running by 30 sec and reducing the walking by 30secs each week.

Also I have been to the Docs, having some tests etc and she said (hopefully this isnt too much info for some), I am probably menopausal which is why I feel down/crap etc!!

I hear ya on that one.... Just do what you can - and you will probably have another phase later on when you feel great. I had a very bad menopausal phase last year- really slowed down for a while and felt bad.I just adjusted my training and accepted the fact that i was having a bad patch- trained accordingly and  it eventually passed and I ran well again. Its not fun- but running will help the transition. Dont try to
"push through it and  force yourself to do more. It will come in good time:)
twosheds

[KiwiShazza]

Try subscribing to Runners World.  It is full of inspirational stuff for newbies etc. I find everytime mine arrives in the mail I devour it and feel motivated again.  I didn't start running until the age of 53yr but now at 60yrs have several half marathons and even a marathon under my belt.  Consistency is my big problem, I'm either full on or full off.  So that is what I'm concentrating on at the moment, making sure I run 3 days during Mon-Fri.  I really enjoy the 2 days sleep in.  Also run on the weekend with running groups and thoroughly enjoy the social aspect.  I find they all cater for slow runners or walk/runners and by belonging to them gets you motivated to run during the week.

[4range]

So, from no motivation at the end of July to ......... Sticking with it 5 days a week! (crap weather & all!)

that's fantastic news!.

Hang in there & whenever you have that little niggle of self doubt, just remember that everyone, no exceptions, had to start somewhere.

Just wait, you will reach that first 800m non stop before you know it.

For now, you should be pleased with yourself & starting to feel better already.

Make sure you keep us informed, so that we can celebrate your next milestone with you.

[PinkDrinkingPony]

Great job Seasider, like the others say stick with it. If you struggle one week you can always repeat that weeks plan, don't rush to improve or you will only injure yourself.
I am always keener to go for a run when I have a new piece of running gear, even if it's just a headband or pair of socks I can't wait to test it out!
Also maybe you need to mix things up a bit. Only go with a friend once a week, run with a club on the weekend, take yourself to a scenic location and go for a bit of a ramble/run to explore. I often get bored when I run the same route and love a trail run when I don't know what's around the next corner (although tell someone where you're going!).

[tonedbutt]

Seasider, great to hear you have made a start and are persevering.  You might get some motivation from the books by John "The Penguin" Bingham.  He was a fat lazy slob who hauled his butt off the lounge at about 46 and now runs and organises marathons.  Some titles are "The Courage to Start" and "No Need for Speed" among others.  These books are entertaining as well as informative and inspiring.

Now as to workout gear.  Sister, you got nothing.  I'm a bit taller than you but I also weigh close to 20kg more.  While it is a bugbear of mine that it can be difficult to get the necessary gear, especially in the bra department, it is possible.  Big W has a range of workout gear by Michelle "Biggest Loser" bridges up to size 20.  They also have Bonds tracky dacks and hoodies in bigger sizes.  I have also seen some gear in Target, but the bigger sizes are harder to find.  Target also do a medium quality sports bra for around 20 bucks.  So check those out and see what you can find.  You will probably feel more comfy in the right gear too.  Good luck with it.

[Tracymumto7]

Seasides, You are doing brilliant! Took me 3 weeks to do week1 of C25K and I've run 2 half marathons a year later. The hardest part is starting.
Thanks for starting this thread I've loved reading it.
I hope you do keep coming back, I'd love to be inspired by how far you go.

Tonnedbutt - I'm off to check out those books, thanks for mentioning them

[Duf]

GO SEASIDER!!!!!!!!! Keep up the good work. Thanks for updating us. Remember it will get easier and the skies the limit with peserverence.

Keep us posted

[lissyf]

Keep at it Seasider!
I started in November last year where I bought a cheap chinese treadmill off ebay as I knew I had no motivation to go to the gym and felt too embarassed to get out and go for a walk. I was also smoking near a pack of cigarettes a day and 15kgs heavier.
I was excited to be able to walk 4kms/hour for 1/2 hour on the treadmill without collasping. I kept at it as I set myself goals to reach and excited to get on there and try and break those goals. I was doing at least 30 minutes each day then gradually found I was easily doing 6kms/hour. Then I started running at 8kms/hour and try to do 2 minutes straight, then walk and then try and beat my 2 minutes by doing 3 etc.
I didn't want to rush into things but did it at a pace I felt comfortable with whilst reaching achievable goals. Before I knew it I was running for 10 minutes at time and with ease.
I have since upgraded to a fancy treadmill that has ifit linked to it so I can compete in competitions. I now easily run at 10.5kms/hour and will run 5kms at a time. The easiest way I have found to increase my speed is to get comfortable at a certain speed and raise it by 0.2km and keep raising it.
Keep at it and there will come a time where you will be able to look back and say  'remember when'.

Edited by lissyf, 19 August 2012 - 05:22 PM.

[LINAR]

Sign up for a triathlon at West Lakes in November/December.  NOTHING will motivate you to get fit like the knowledge that in a few months you will have to run around in front of 300 people wearing little more than a swimsuit!

It sounds glib, but it worked for me!

[Seasider]

Well I spent all last week doing nothing as I had ulcers under my teeth and every movement hurt like anything. All back and good this week though and have just run, yes run 2km's.....

BUT it took me 17 1/2 mins (not so impressive!!!)

[Duf]

Seasider, on 27 August 2012 - 03:01 PM, said:

Well I spent all last week doing nothing as I had ulcers under my teeth and every movement hurt like anything. All back and good this week though and have just run, yes run 2km's.....

BUT it took me 17 1/2 mins (not so impressive!!!)

WOOOO HOOOOOOO

Nice work!!! Don't worry about the time at all and concentrate on what you have achieved already!!
Fantastic.
Oh and I presume you had ulcers under your feet, not teeth?????

[4range]

Seasider,

2km in such a short time is an awesome effort.

How are you feeling within yourself? - bet you never thought you would be able to get this far, 3 months ago Huh?

By the sounds of it, it's too late for you & you have joined the ranks of the rest of us addicts!

Dont push yourself too hard, just take measured steps & enjoy the gradual improvements.

Can you see yourself realising that goal of surprising your friend by asking to run with them, yet?

Sounds like you're getting close.

Eagerly awaiting your next update..............

[tonedbutt]

Hey Seasider, great work.  Once you build up a bit of fitness/endurance, then you can work at improving your times.

[Seasider]

Oh dear, have had a really bad day, went out and could only manager to run a couple of hundred metres before I had to catch my breath, what on earth is happening????? I just kept walking/running for the route, but feel a bit fed up now!

[argon]

You'll have good days and bad days - keep at it and don't be discouraged. If the running just isn't happening on a certain day, then go for a longer walk than usual. You'll still build up your fitness that way.

Your body might be recovering from something still. If I get ulcers it's usually a sign that my body is fighting some stuff. I often find that once my general health improves my running feels better too - I guess our bodies send the energy where it is needed.

Keep at it!!

[sharrison]

I dont profess to be an expert but I get the impression some days you'll have great runs, some days you'll go ok and some days will just be a struggle. its just the way it goes.

Edited by sharrison, 30 August 2012 - 03:25 PM.

[4range]

Mmmmm - not the sort of update we were hoping for !

But the other guys are right - good days & bad days, just go with the flow, dont punish yourself.

Happens to all of us - for me, was Monday, ran Monday night & put in a big effort, I just knew I was pumping out a fantastic time - the lungs were burning & the legs were heavy & I even felt the nausea that you get when you work really hard. On checking the results, I was 20seconds a kilometer slower than my "average" pace - very dissapointed.

But guess what?

I'm out there again tonight!

Stick with it, for every dissapointing run you will have 2 or 3 really, really fantastic runs. (have a quick review of what you have done - you have already hit the 2k mark in a fairly short time, right!)

You might have just pushed a little too hard, wind it back just a little & report back!

Good luck.

[knight60]

G'day Seasider,

There is some simply awesome advice out there. I try to pick up lots of good tips on forums, from colleagues, friends, anywhere!

One little tip that works for me when a little voice inside me is telling me to give up, stay in bed etc is to say back to myself:

Yes. It is so nice and warm in bed, and another hour's sleep would be lovely. BUT: if I get up now and do my 40 minute run, it will make me feel awesome and set me up for the rest of the day.

Then I get straight up and put my running gear on and head out the door. Even when it is 2to 3 degrees outside on a crappy winter morning.

There is a large body of evidence to support this technique as being a trait that those who stick to goals use versus those who don't (and give up).

Nothing here is a "have to", whether it is number of days per week, distance to run etc. Do it all using a "want to" rather than "have to" approach.

All real and lasting change comes from the inside and works its way out.

I've been running for 20 years, and even though I am now pretty fit, am an experienced runner and get out 5-6 times per week, running over 50km per week it is still true for me that every first km of every run I do absolutely SUCKS. I find it a bit uncomfortable. I think it's my brain trying to get me to quit. But I push through, do what the Kenyans do (they have a saying - let the run come to you) and start to get in the groove. And somewhere after the first km and after I finish I feel So ALIVE. It lasts for hours.

I hope you get hooked like this. Best of luck!

[Ponytail]

Keep at it, Seasider. The CR's are an awesome and encouraging community but the worse thing you can do is compare yourself or undermine your achievements on the basis that they do more. Look at the kudos these guys have given you and feel proud.  We all started like you, wondering if running would ever feel good.  It will, if you stick at it. The reason so many try and fail to stick at running is because it hurts so much at the start.  Once you've got that base fitness, it gets easier.

You've got a lot of people on this forum who believe in you, despite not knowing you, so all you have to do is back yourself and one day you'll be posting this kind of support to another beginner.

Hang in there and keep us posted!

[tonedbutt]

Ok I'll throw my hat into the ring too, although I'm in agreement generally with previous posters.  Since commencing my training 12 weeks ago I have learned a lot about myself and one thing is that I am not a good starter.  It takes me several kilometres on a good day, and most of the run on a bad day to get into the groove, and sometimes it doesn't happen at all.  As I mentioned, I am a substantial build and maybe it takes that long to get all the tissues oxygenated and firing "on the eight" as the poem goes.  Stick with it and it does improve.  Sure it needs effort but it is well worth it.  Endurance first, speed comes last.  You can do it Seasider.

BTW, I love that Kenyan saying that knight60 posted - "let the run come to you".

[Seasider]

I am so glad I joined this forum, everyone is so positive!. Well I didnt go out for two days, went out yesterday and had a bit of a run (three walks of ten seconds to catch my breath) and felt great!!! Thanks everyone, hopefully I shall just post positive posts from now on!

[HombreCorriendo]

Hi Seasider - treat yourself to the occasional inspiring video.  This one's being doing the rounds for a while now and never fails to help give you a kick:

[mutk]

Seasider, on 03 September 2012 - 10:06 AM, said:

I am so glad I joined this forum, everyone is so positive!. Well I didnt go out for two days, went out yesterday and had a bit of a run (three walks of ten seconds to catch my breath) and felt great!!! Thanks everyone, hopefully I shall just post positive posts from now on!

I find it motivating to discuss my epic failures in equal measure to my (so far very little)  epic success. Figuring out how to cope with, deal with, or live with failure is a part of growing up and being an adult, fully functioning human being in society. Part of that is listening to and dealing with criticism too BTW. Us humans are habitually competitive. We _compare_  ourselves with our peers, it is part of our nature. We need to live with it.

Just thought I'd mention this, because I think excessive 'positive' discussion whilst ignoring certain real world scenarios is not exactly illustrative of emotional good health. There is room to be tough in yourself too so giving yourself a metaphorical kick in the pants may be a good thing

Cheers

[Duf]

Hang in there Seasider.....For me running/training has been like a wave - ups and downs. The trick is when you have a down to not be discouraged, harness it and continue knowing that the only way from there is up. It is just all apart of it.

My hubby recently started running with me and it took him a little bit to learn how much he could actually push his body. His threshold was quite low until he realised that if he pushed it a bit harder he was still ok.

All the best.

[LINAR]

HombreCorriendo, on 03 September 2012 - 10:36 AM, said:

Hi Seasider - treat yourself to the occasional inspiring video.  This one's being doing the rounds for a while now and never fails to help give you a kick:

I've been known to spend a good hour on youtube looking for video's to inspire me to go out and run for 30 minutes!  Some days it's easy.  Other days I would much rather be sitting on my couch eating deep fried banana and peanut butter sandwiches.  Some days I feel like I am flying.  Other days I feel like my brain is about to haemorrhage.  It's all part of the journey.

[knight60]

If you want a lift, try the movie "Without Limits" about the late great Steve Prefontaine. Billy Cruddup did a great job as Steve, as did Donald Sutherland playing Coach Bowerman. That movie makes me want to get out and smash out a big 10 k'er.

There's also the movie "Pre" starring Jared Leto as Steve. Not bad either.

Also, if you can find it, try "On the Edge" - an 80's running movie starring Bruce Dern, inspired by the Double Dipsea race in California. There's a great quote from his wily old coach who tells him something like, "I want you to burn up the hills and soar down them. But when you burn up the hills, I want you to yell, 'Soar! Soar! Soar!' and when you soar down the hills I want you to yell, 'Burn! Burn! Burn!' ".

I love that movie!

[4range]

OK Seasider,

another week has passed, & we are none the wiser as to how you are travelling!

So tell us, how are you going?

Are you "getting into it" or is it still a bit of a chore to get going? (that's OK too by the way, so long as you do keep going!)

I know you guy's have had some pretty ordinary weather over there, but spring is here & the good stuff is on it's way!

Waiting with baited breath...........................

[knight60]

Me too! (baited breath)...

[Duf]

...and me (breath still baited)

[Seasider]

Right, I am still going strong!, I am doing the 2kms in just over 13 mins, I find I still have to have a walk every now and then, just to catch my breath! I want to go a bit further, but not too sure what I should aim for, 2 1/2 or 3km, dont want to push myself too hard, but dont want to under do it either. I try to go at least five times a week.